I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Too much gin, very little bucket
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
