You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
