She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
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You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
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THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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