kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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