Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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