I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
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I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
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There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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