Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
