Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
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