Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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