his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
