Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize