Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize