Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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