she woke up with a sticky ear
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
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