At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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