she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Randomize
