Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize
