Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
