Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
