last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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