i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
