college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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