My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
