yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Holy sore nipples Batman
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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