A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Randomize
