I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize