Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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