summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
