Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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