I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
