THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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