she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
