WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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