i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
