i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
My ass is underappreciated
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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