Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
