You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
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It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
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I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
he had hair everywhere except his balls