i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.