Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i jhust puked up my retainher.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
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I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
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I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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