the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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