wake up i wanna do it froggy style
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
should my penis look like a turkey
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Randomize
