i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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