youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
