why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Vodka?
Forever.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize