So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
