Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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