So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
3pm strippers are depressing
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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