4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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