this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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