Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize