Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Randomize
