I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
wow bdsm is so cute
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
