i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
